Back in the early stages of your relationship, sex used to happen effortlessly, right? There wasn’t much thought or effort required, and it seemed to flow naturally. However, over time, that easy flow seemed to dry up. Now, most of the time, you feel too tired, the timing isn’t right, or there’s too much going on in your life to get in the mood.
To be brutally honest, sex no longer excites you; it just feels like going through the motions. Instead of turning you on, it makes you anxious, and you find yourself wondering how you got to this point.
Many women may attribute this to having a low libido, and they wonder how to fix it. However, it feels out of their control, like a mysterious mix of hormones and desire they don’t know how to change.
The truth is, there’s much more you can do to reignite the spark and create a fulfilling sex life that lasts, regardless of how long you’ve been together. You can feel excited about sex again, feel sensual, and get your sex life back on track.
Here are seven mind-blowing truths that you need to know to fix low libido:
- There’s No Such Thing As ‘Libido’: The common belief that sexual desire is a biological drive is a myth. Blaming yourself for having a low libido only makes you feel broken. The reality is that desire is not some mystical force controlling you; it’s you. You have control over your arousal, and understanding how desire works is essential.
- You’re in the Driver’s Seat: The magic of sexual arousal happens in the brain, and it involves both an accelerator and a brake. Some people have a sensitive brake that can easily switch off their desire, while others have a sensitive accelerator that turns them on easily. To fix low libido, you need to identify what’s hitting your brake or what’s not hitting your accelerator enough.
- Stress is the Enemy: Stress is the number one killer of sexual desire and arousal. Blaming low hormones or a broken libido doesn’t help when it’s actually stress that’s affecting your sex life. Acknowledging and managing stress levels is crucial for rekindling desire.
- Fake It ’til You Make It: While you should never force yourself to have sex or fake orgasms, you can adopt a mindset shift. Assume the identity of someone who enjoys and looks forward to sex. This doesn’t mean faking pleasure, but rather reconnecting with the part of you that enjoys sex and turning up its volume.
- There’s Always a High Desire & Low Desire Partner: In any relationship, there will always be one partner with a higher desire for sex. It’s essential to learn how to manage the desire gap through communication and understanding.
- The Sex Needs to be Worth Having: Sometimes, the issue isn’t low libido but rather the quality of sex. Knowing what turns you on, learning about your body’s needs, and introducing new practices can make sex more fulfilling.
- It’s Not Just About Sex: Libido is your zest for life, and when you feel burnt-out or uninspired, your desire for sex can diminish. Prioritizing self-care and finding fulfillment in life can help rekindle your sexual desire.
Remember, there’s no quick fix or magical pill for low libido. Understanding the underlying causes and taking appropriate actions can lead to positive changes and a more fulfilling sex life. It’s about addressing what’s truly going on in your sex life, relationship, and life in general, and making changes that bring more joy and fulfillment.
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