It’s okay if you’re unsure about safe words and how they work – many people are. Even if you associate safe words with BDSM, they have broader uses. Let’s explore what safe words are in more detail.
What’s a Safe Word?
Let’s talk history a bit. Originally from the BDSM community, safe words have been around since the late 1970s or early 1980s, alongside efforts to ensure safety and consent. While Fifty Shades of Grey brought them into the spotlight, safe words aren’t limited to BDSM.
A safe word is a word chosen by partners before sex. Either partner can use it if things get too intense and need to pause or stop. When the safe word is said, all sexual activity halts – it’s like hitting pause.
This word allows the submissive partner to communicate discomfort or pain. Safe words are now used by many couples outside the BDSM community too, giving them a way to stop anytime during intimate moments.
How Do Safe Words Work?
Safe words are simple yet powerful. They provide a clear signal to stop without feeling uncomfortable about saying “stop” or “that hurts.” Even if you’re not tied up or doing anything extreme, a safe word offers an exit if things get too much.
Choosing Your Safe Word
Selecting a safe word involves a few considerations:
- Use a Single Word: Opt for a short and strong word, making it clear when things should stop.
- Avoid Common Words: Don’t choose words like “yes,” “no,” or anything sexual. It should stand out and not be part of bedroom talk.
- Easy to Pronounce: Ensure you can say the word clearly even in the heat of the moment.
- Inform Your Partner: Let your partner know the word and what it means. Decide if it means stopping entirely or just slowing down.
Popular Safe Words
Here are some common safe words people use:
- Traffic Light System: “Red” means stop, “yellow” signals slowing down, and “green” means continue.
- Apple: A non-sexy word that’s easy to remember and recognize.
- Vanilla: A signal for gentler, less intense moments.
- Pineapple: Unlikely to be confused with anything else.
- Pause: A straightforward word for stopping.
- Mango, Unicorn, Banana: Unlikely-to-use-in-bed words.
- Beetlejuice: Surprisingly popular, maybe due to its uniqueness.
- Justin Bieber: Yes, even celebrity names can work. (lol)
- Foliage: If you’re into nature and hiking.
- Cacao: Unusual and easy to remember.
Nonverbal Safe Words
If verbal communication isn’t possible, try nonverbal signals:
- Snapping Fingers: If physically feasible.
- Tune-Humming: Hum a known tune to signal stopping.
Safe words are about creating a comfortable way to communicate during intimate moments, ensuring both partners are on the same page about boundaries and comfort levels.
For more content, see www.findwhosabiblog.com and follow @findwhosabi_ on Instagram and Facebook